015: For All of my Life.

For All of my Life – M.Y.M.P

Come and lay here beside me
I’ll tell you how I feel
There’s a secret inside me
I’m ready to reveal

To have you close, embrace your heart
with my love
over and over
These are things that I promise
my promise to you

CHORUS:

For all of my life
you are the one, i will love you faithfully forever
all of my life you are the one
I’ll give to you my greatest love
for all of my life.

ooohhh..
o yeah…

Let me lay down beside you
There’s something you should know
I pray that you decide to
open your heart and let me show
enchanted worlds of fairy tales
a wonderland of love
these are things that I promise
my promise to you

chorus

all of my life
with all of my heart
these are things that I promise

chorus

014: Coward.

The perspiration trickles down his spine,
As he turns to face the mirror.
He was shocked by the cold expression,
That appears on the man in the mirror.

The lack of courage disgusted him,
The lousy character he’s portraying,
It irks him.

Now the 30th seems so far,
But he has to be strong.
Please God not let it be,
If she has to suffer, then let it be me…………………….

013: Long flight.

In another 5 hours, i will be in the air from Singapore to Paris airport.
Then i will take another plane from Paris to Cassablanca.
And a final flight from Cassablanca to Marrakesh (Morocco).

It’s gonna be my first business meeting, and i will be meeting with my corporate.
Packing up really makes my blood boil.
With your parents biting on you behind,
Suddenly the trip just don’t seem so interesting.

I’m well known for being last minute,
But yet detailed and i like doing things at my own pace.
On the other hand, my parents seem to like doing things so early,
Like forcing me to go to the airport so early.

Worried about traffic jams,
Worried about missing flights,
I know all these do happen,
But… i still prefer to do it at my own pace.

But well, they mean no harm,
Just don’t want me to miss my flight.
So…..
If they insist, then just go early.
All benefits and no harm at all!!

Though don’t like it,
But still suck it up….

It will cost me $3 per minute to call home.
It will cost me $0.75 per msg.
I’m 8 hours earlier than Singapore.
So your 8pm, is my lunch time at 12pm.

Don’t think i will call home.
Maybe with msn/skype,
I should be able to get by.

That’s about it.
I should be able to tap the wireless and continue blogging.
So stay tuned!!

012: Chapter 1.

It’s amazing how Fate can play games with you. It’s like as if God is looking from above and seeing how 2 people can get together, then live their own individual lives, then get back together again. Alot of people have been asking us how did we get together, and how did everything just started. And we both know the answer is – Fate.

Talking about fate, i’m sure most of you guys will not believe that our story can put Channel 8 dramas to shame. One even compared us to korean drama. We both thought it will be good to write out our story so we don’t have to answer to many questions. Let’s see….. our story begins a decade ago……..

It was during our secondary sch days that we met. I was then a chairman in my orchestra and was invited to join this chinese orchestra group with my younger sis. I was there for about 6 months before one random sunday, this really sweet girl appears out of nowhere. She was playing another instrument and she caught my eyes immediately. It was near chinese new year then, so we were planning this large bbq at our instructor’s place and i took this chance to speak to her cousin – since she was taking the same instrument as me.

So i kinda go through all lengths to bluff her cousin to get her number but it wasn’t that easy. Eventually her cousin gave in and i got the sweet girl’s number. Everything then started from there………..

Stay tuned for Chapter 2…

011: Trashed.

Location: Home
Mood: Never any sadder

Maybe the weather was warm,
Maybe it was the calm before the storm,
Maybe because i am helpless,
Or maybe i’m just plain useless.

Never once bothered to what others said,
Either i ignore or my temper turns fiery red,
But today, i’ll never forget why i wasn’t mad,
I just simply, simply felt very very sad.

The waves of words just hit me hard,
Every sentence, forever will leave me scarred,
I listened to her every single word,
Deep down inside me, i knew i was hurt.

Maybe the weather was warm,
Maybe it was the calm before the storm,
Maybe because i am helpless,
Or maybe i’m just plain useless.
=====
Maybe the weather was warm,
Maybe it was the calm before the storm,
Maybe because i am helpless,
Or maybe i’m just plain useless.

Recently the mood was all so wrong,
I thought i was pretty much very strong,
Her every word, i listened with my heart,
Some were warm while some were cuts.

I never know when is the next moment,
Her smiles assured me that leaving my life she wouldn’t,
I don’t remember when was the last time,
Her anger confirmed my presence as a slime

Maybe the weather was warm,
Maybe it was the calm before the storm,
Maybe because i am helpless,
Or maybe i’m just plain useless.
=====
Maybe the weather was warm,
Maybe it was the calm before the storm,
Maybe because i am helpless,
Or maybe i’m just plain useless.

She looked at me and said get lost,
For a moment everything in me just frost,
I thought i heard all wrongly,
But the look on her face says “i’m not joking”.

I didn’t bother to fight the bitter waves,
Her presence will definitely make me feel safe,
Down the handbrake, she sped away,
I know i had our worst day today.

Maybe the weather was warm,
Maybe it was the calm before the storm,
Maybe because i am helpless,
Or maybe i’m just plain useless.
=====
Maybe the weather was warm,
Maybe it was the calm before the storm,
Maybe because i am helpless,
Or maybe i’m just plain useless.

Perhaps we sang our last swan song,
But I felt i was badly wronged,
I asked buddy to make me smile,
He only said,
She has fallen so deep for you that she turns hostile.

She’s upset she can’t understand your heart,
She’s upset because she knows you both cannot be apart,
You’re sad cos you can’t reach her heart,
You’re sad because your love and hers are so strong, you both retards

Maybe the weather was warm,
Maybe it was the calm before the storm,
Maybe because i am helpless,
Or maybe i’m just plain useless.
=====
Maybe the weather was warm,
Maybe it was the calm before the storm,
Maybe because i am helpless,
Or maybe i’m just plain useless.

Buddy then said if she doesn’t love you anymore,
Why did she flare up and feel so sored?
If she doesn’t love you anymore,
Why she continued to be so nice when everyone said and she simply ignored?

This is what you both are really dumb and lousy in acting,
Actually you both care and wanna make the best outing,
She herself also confused why she’s so angry in the man she believes,
I’m sure even again in her life, she will never want you to leave.

Maybe the weather was warm,
Maybe it was the calm before the storm,
Maybe because i am helpless,
Or maybe i’m just plain useless.

010: At Times.

Location: Home
Mood: Tired but clear-minded

It seems a lil harder to start, but i think we all need to take our first “baby step”. Life isn’t always about receiving with thanks, sometimes we need to give too.

The Wind visited me this morning. She took the Rain with her. Whispering in my ears “She wants you to know… She will be there.” Rain then gave me a kiss on the face.

“I know she will be yours someday, just give it some time.
And one day when she is ready,
She will appear in front of you again,
And your future will begin.”

So i pull myself out of bed feeling sucky and pathetic. Looking in to the mirror, I smiled. The strong positive-ness in me will not allow me to sink, as strong as an ox, “Let’s move on,” he said.

After washing up, I turned on my 2 laptops – work + personal. Telling myself, it’s just tough to walk, but i’ll recover, Kins assured me. I have many things to accomplish in the next 4 years. I’ve found the partner i wanna spend my life with, she is just currently unavailable.

Mok called at 4am, for new business opportunities and I turned her down and told her why. She wants to know the full story, like my other close friends do. I’m not in a habit of sharing my personal life, but Mok said it’s a form of therapy. So this period of time, whenever i’m feeling down or something, just write it out. At times, i’ll write some bits and pieces of our times together just to keep myself warm. As i mentioned, i have so much to accomplish in the next 4 years.

But here’s some bad points of myself that Kins and I discussed:
1. bad tempered
2. egoistic
3. possessive
4. do lie sometimes (for valid reasons)
5. selfish

So to all hearbroken lovers, don’t give up in Life.
There is so much, so much more to do,
to see,
to play,
to learn,
to have fun,
to fall,
and to stand up once more.

You can choose to wallow in your self-pity and cry that the whole world is unfair to you but God is fair. He gave you a chance to love her and she loved you truly with every space in her heart but you gave it up. You will always meet two sides of the coin and you will definitely wish to keep both sides but honestly, we know one side has to meet the down.

Continue loving her, care for her, give her all the concern. Of course, it’s hard to forget any relationship but you have a something with her that no one can take that away from you. It’s unique, heart-warming and only exclusively belongs to you. I call her “Memories”. Heartbreak is not the end of the world, honestly, i’m not being a loser by saying these but someday, you will fall in love again when the right person (it doesn’t necessay means a different person, she still can be the one).

Some people are pretty dumbasses and they just need a lil more time *silent dig at Kins* to find out on their path of learning love.

Kins said once to me that when you make a decision, you won’t regret because at that point of decision making, you must have weigh out both sides and went ahead with the decision. (Yea, she has those real words of wisdom sometimes..). If both parties are mature adults, i mean give her a call and tell her it’s hard for you to just move on suddenly. Tell her you will try to move on, but you need time.

She will definitely give you the time. I’m sure Kins will always be there for me and continue loving me in her own special way. Strings of attachment don’t cut off in an hour or a few days. It takes awhile, slowly and most importantly, don’t hurt another one’s heart. This relationship is about you and her (the first one), don’t drag someone else in.

You have the rights to tell the world you are unavailable and you have no intention of finding anyone soon. Some people said, the best way to getting over a relationship is to jump into a new one. It’s not a big deal, guys.. I’m sure we can do it..

Kins and i will always share this special bond between us. 10 years ago, now and 10 years later. You can never predict the future, so don’t act like you can. 10 years ago, we got together then till now, we are still together, just in another form.

If you really, really love her so much, don’t give her up. Stand by her, and i’m sure she will be glad to stand by you. So stay tuned to my next entry. Let’s work hard for this girl we love and i always believe in miracles, hope you believe in me too :)

009: “Busy, busy, busy”

Location: Home
Mood: Good :)

Kins and i are heading out today,
Past few days we had sharing sessions.
We can talk about anything actually,
And we are quite open to things. i like :)

Someone who never fails to surprise me,
With her “once-in-a-blue-moon” words of wisdom,
But last night convo till 5am!!
Woke up like some zombies.

I have so much backlogs to do for my blog!!

More ads coming in but i have no time this wk.

Watch out for my “next meal @ Anchor Point” with pictures!!
Went for the lovely dinner with my family. Stay Tuned!!

In 16 days, i clocked 200 visitors!
My ad-ders are happy people!!

008: Once and Now.

Location: Home
Mood: Like the weather this morning

Once placed first on the list of people she will die for,
Now placed first on the list of people she wants to ignore.
Once held the hand of hers, taking that moment for granted,
Now for ten seconds, you felt as happy as a bird.

Once cried her eyes out for you, like when she broke up with her bestest friend,
Now probably will shed a tear or two, at the funeral of yours that she may attend,
Once sending her home seems like a tiring chore,
Now if you are willing, you can’t do that anymore.

Once gave her up for that tiny freedom you craved for,
Now with the freedom, you craved for her much more.
Once hated to run, jog, sprint or brisk-walk,
Now you’d walk the perimeter of a school just to reach her block.

Once her confident knight in that shining armour,
Now a pile of rusting metal, beside her you feel inferior.
Once the solutions to all her questions,
Now telling you this, you are the cause of her depression.

Once did all ur best to keep away from her, finding her a pain,
Now why feel sad when she said we might not be together again.
Once saved her money to buy nice gifts for you,
Now she’s saving them for the someone she will say “i do”.

Once made her felt she made the best decision in her love,
Now made her felt dumb and crazy and a lil sick of.
Once said i’m missing you every single night and day,
Now saying it because we are parting and walking on our own individual ways.

Once her first love, and she thought you guys will last,
Now tells you, you are really better than the boy from the past.
Once knew she will see me everyday,
Now wondering if there will be another such a day.

Once put herself in my shoes and suffered alone long ago,
Now is my turn, put myself in her shoes and let her go,
Once she gave her heart, her life and her lovely hugs,
Now it’s in words, ending “take care, Hugs……….”

- kel.

007: Through the night.

Location: Home
Mood: Thinking

Macy Gray – Don’t Forget Me

In the wintertime
Keep your feet warm
But keep your clothes on and don’t forget me
Keep the memories
But keep your powder dry too

In the summer by the poolside
While the fireflies are all around you
I’ll miss you when I’m lonely
I’ll miss the sunshine too

Now don’t forget me
Please don’t forget me
Make is easy on me just for a little while
You know I think about you
I hope you’ll think about me too

When we’re older a little slower
It doesn’t matter now come on get happy
‘Cause nothing lasts forever
But I will always love you

Now don’t forget me
Please don’t forget me
Make is easy on me just for a little while
You know I think about you
I hope you’ll think about me too

Michael Jackson – You Are Not Alone

Another day has gone
I’m still all alone
How could this be
You’re not here with me
You never said goodbye
Someone tell me why
Did you have to go
And leave my world so cold

Everyday I sit and ask myself
How did love slip away
Something whispers in my ear and says
That you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you’re far away
I am here to stay

But you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we’re far apart
You’re always in my heart
But you are not alone

‘Lone, ‘lone
Why, ‘lone

Just the other night
I thought I heard you cry
Asking me to come
And hold you in my arms
I can hear your prayers
Your burdens I will bear
But first I need your hand
Then forever can begin

Everyday I sit and ask myself
How did love slip away
Something whispers in my ear and says
That you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you’re far away
I am here to stay

For you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we’re far apart
You’re always in my heart
For you are not alone

Whisper three words and I’ll come runnin’
And girl you know that I’ll be there
I’ll be there

You are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you’re far away
I am here to stay
For you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we’re far apart
You’re always in my heart

For you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you’re far away
I am here to stay

For you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we’re far apart
You’re always in my heart

For you are not alone…

006: Chillin’ @ Mac.

Location: Ang Mo Kio Mac
Mood: Contented :)

Tomorrow is TGIF – Thank God it’s Friday,
As we approach the end of the month, it’s PAYDAY!
Chilling now at the Mac cafe,
My last program before i end the day..

It’s relaxing to be doing nothing,
Enjoying finger food and a cup of drink,
Hearing boybands playing on the radio,
Everything seems to be moving slow..

Will be heading to Morocco in two months’ time,
Boss said now is the start for me to climb,
Mingling with the big boys from the big corporate leagues,
Should be exciting, especially with the fun-loving colleagues..

In the meantime, school is just around the corner,
Definitely prefer working life than be in the former,
As excited as i am, looking forward to tomorrow,
Awaiting the figures in my bank account to show!